"LOST" in Friendship

Narrator: Samhitha

Everyone’s life is made up of three constituents: If the first part of our life are parents who guide us into the society, second is the career which defines our position in the society. Third, is the soul mate which decorates our defined life and creates a heavenly ambience around it. All the way, there’s one more, who created a background support and provided silent inspiration in every step of us- A Friend. My life too had all of these, and that friend was so special to me. In fact, he was so special that, I was forced to hurt him. Result was the scar, so deep into the both of our hearts that it probably won’t heal. Now, I just wish for one thing in my life- No matter how much my heart bleeds, I’ll give every drop of it for healing his heart. Here’s my story:

   Lately, it's been going away.
I think I’ve began to forget you. I wish I could get one chance to refresh my memory, I wish I could see how you looked with your eyes closed, or with your brows furrowed while you fended someone’s call, all those intimate things that only lovers know of.

   All I get to see are frowns now; defensive masks that you put up to not let a thing leak through to me, as if you fear I will keep your emotions hostage. I still wish I could see you candid again, unafraid to laugh out loud, or to look intently at me. Or the sky.

   When I see you next, can you promise to open yourself to me again, just this once?

   I have been haunted by him in these dreams asking me the same question, over and over again. Sad thing is that, I wasn’t able to answer these questions, even once.

   The first time I saw him- Neither there were any butterflies flying in my stomach, nor there was any romantic BGM playing in my heart. He was just any other person in the world. But not for long! Soon, he became that background which made the canvas of my painted life more beautiful. He ‘was’ my best friend for so long that time gradually wiped off the thin line between friendship and love and I was unknowingly swept into the world of love.

   It was too late before I realized that it all happened in a hassle and as I was dragged into it unknowingly, I forgot my heart in the world of friendship and there’s no place for me in the world of love.

   I was not able to answer my dream, not because I don’t know it, but because I don’t want to. I was not forced, I was not threatened. I just drifted towards the sea of love. I never felt sad for not feeling the same ‘love’ he felt on me. But I feel sad for not even regretting it. I feel guilty because I am the reason for the sadness of my best friend! We felt in love, despite our differences, breaking the strong bond of friendship unknowingly. And once we did, something rare and beautiful was created. For me love like that happened only once, and that’s why every minute we spent is seared in my memory.  I’ll never regret and never forget a single moment of it.

   Or wait! If it was never supposed to be love, why am I wandering over the point that ‘love’ like that happened only once! May be because, I truly miss him and love him- as my best buddy ever. We are still friends, after what all happened and shattered our dreams. But we aren’t the same old buddies who used to share everything and laugh at one another. We aren’t the same old pair who proved that pure friendship can exist in this insane world.

  

    I just want you and me to be ‘us’ once again.  Some people come into our lives and many leave us. But very few leave their footprints in our hearts and you are one of them. It is so simple. Just follow those foot prints again and you’ll be once again into the forgotten world. Waiting for u……